You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
