my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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