Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
