I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
