According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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