My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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