god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
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