I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
