there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
