Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
