Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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