Sry I called you an 8
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
