why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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