You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
