So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
