Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
