from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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