I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
