Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
How does one acquire holy water?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
