she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
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