If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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