He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize