Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
