Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
And then my night got REAL pukey
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
