I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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