You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
