i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
