No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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