I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
