Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
