It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
