Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
We were destined to go to rehab together
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
