her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Randomize
