Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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