I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize
