Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
