Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She bit a glass in half.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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