It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
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