Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
