Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
