i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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