I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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