STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Randomize
