If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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