This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
