i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
love makes seman taste better
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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