just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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