yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I can't turn off my feet"
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
