Small penises have feelings too.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
