i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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